what I want to want…

“Speaking in gross generalities, Christians enjoy benefits such as freedom from the rule of sin, support from the Body, access to the throne of God, and of course the elite privilege of being right about everything.  But the hard work of the Kingdom is not at the top of very many peoples’ agenda.  I habitually say, “I want to” when an “I do” is what the occasion calls for.  I suspect that I do this because I don’t want to commit to action.  I don’t want to incur the accountability and sacrifice of doing what needs to be done or could be done.  It is generally easier to talk about something than to actually do it.

We are not all completely negligent.  We act for the Kingdom to varying degrees in various ways.  I’m just trying to articulate the reality of being the kind of Kingdom citizen who gets out to vote then wears his sticker for everyone to see, but whose participation in Kingdom work is usually limited to what he can do without cramping his lifestyle.  I know that I am supposed to die to my selfish wants and follow Christ, but what that actually involves  – considering others as more important than myself, helping people in need, and blessing those who persecute me – seems to be very difficult to do.  … I want things like love and social justice in theory, but what I pursue in my day to day existence is comfort, recognition, and security.

This is why the issue of “false want” is a Trojan horse for self-worship – my desire for life to be about me.  Christian culture perpetuates the problem, I think, because we have come to place such a high value on things like passion and transparency.  I can do very little in the way of Kingdom work just as long as I talk openly about what I want to want.  Meanwhile, I can do what I really want.”   – Will Walker in Kingdom of Couches

ouch.

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